Free in the Break Room: Fudge

2 boxes of Murdick's fudgeWhen someone goes to Mackinac Island in Michigan, you know you’re going to get some fudge back.

But Clive from Compliance brought back this fudge, and let me tell you, I didn’t think he had it in him.

There’s two flavors: Double chocolate, which is doubly chocolatey, and peanut butter, which is buttery and peanutty, and both are absolutely delicious. But that’s not why.

What’s so special about this fudge? This fudge was made by more dicks.

Yeah. Looks like boring old Compliance Clive is a nymphomaniac!

Most fudge only requires one or two or maybe three dicks at the most—one for stirring, one for adding cream to the mix, and one for greasing the pan. But this fudge has more dicks—dicks to measure out the marshmallows, dicks to add some sugar, dicks to pour in some chocolate, dicks to grab the saucepan out of a musty old cupboard, dicks to turn the heat up on the stovetop, dicks to take the fudge’s temperature and keep it just at the edge of boiling, dicks to plunge the fudge into the icebox, dicks to smash nuts to add to the top, and dicks to pack all the fudge into tidy little boxes.

There are more dicks involved in this fudging process than at a Nixon impersonator convention.


I see.


This is kind of embarrassing.

Just enjoy the candy and pretend I didn’t say anything. And… don’t tell Clive. I think his face would explode.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s